A Better Version

So, why would a guy named Jacob ever want to invent something. Let's say Jacob invented an effin ladder.
What would this ladder do? He didn't know, but it was a first. Sure give him all the credit, her made the first..
.... idiot. The next day the newer, better, ladder2 came out. The next day the Ladder3 came out. You could just
count the flippin days since Jacob invented the ladder, and the ladder(who bloody cares) would be coming out on
that day. Anyway, I bought this ladder. It was supposedly the original, the Ladder. It wasn't even a ladder!
The thing was more of a stick. It turns out that ladders were originally used to "ladder people to death" before
stones were invented. Ladders had jsut eventually evolved into something you climb onto before stoning someone
to death for that extra leverage and increased chance of a headshot. Hence, I would Jacob's ladder was some lethal
life ending move of certain death used in concert with this stick from which he gained fame. Just because
Jacob killed somebody with a ladder all ladders are belong to JAcob. Well dammit, I want all corvettes blong to me.
I'll just have to find a creative way to kill somebody with one and gain fame for it. Soon, Aaron's corvette
(the flippin original) will gain fame after I "corvette someone to death" with one. Maybe I'll do it from the top
of a ladder. It will be like a corvette headshot fatality supermove for the anals of time. Yes, I also invented
time.

Currently 8.33/10
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Rating: 8.3 out of 6 votes cast