Bi-Sexual Polar Bear

A day life at Forthingwood Zoo,

Norman the youngest and he thought better looking of the two polar bears at Forthingwood Zoo strutted around the enclosure like a dog in heat. After a while he got bored and plonked his fat lazy arse down on the grass beside the rock Geraldine was resting on.

Norman’s sighs and fidgeting she simply ignored. Geraldine was content to do nothing other than digest a hearty breakfast as she soaked up the early morning sunshine, balancing half on and half off a giant rock in what must be an uncomfortable position.

“Bugger off.” She said when it was clear that flouting his obvious attempts to strike a conversation were not going to be enough of a deterrent. Too old and set in her ways, Geraldine was not in the mood for youthful excitement, nor did she care to discuss the eminent arrival of two new bears to the zoo.

As usual, Norman would not take her words as a statement that he should adhere to and continued to sit.

“I wonder where they come from?” he said, resigned to the fact no conversation was forthcoming from Geraldine. “You know me Geraldine? He asked anyway, “I am not in any way, shape or manner a racist, but I do hope the newcomers are white.” Norman continued.

Bemused, Geraldine shook her head in disbelief. She had to know. “What are you on about?” she said turning around.

“I am not going to be no brown grizzly bears bitch boy.” Norman answered.

Geraldine could not believe what she was hearing and told the idiot to fuck off.

“Come and play with daddy white boy.” Norman tried his best impersonation of a Brown Jamaican Bear but was unable to hide his Middle English accent.

Geraldine rolled her eyes and just shook her head.

“I wonder if it’s true.” He said after a short pause.

“If what’s true.” she replied and found herself caught in this cray conversation.

Norman moved closer, looked around, checking out the area, making sure no one could overhear him. Gesturing towards his crotch and in a low voice, asked “Is it true brown bears have bigger…you know…penises.”

This was too much of an opertunity to miss, “You are a fucking poof.” She answered, and before Norman could interrupt, Geraldine burst into hearty laughter.

“We were only cage mates.” Said Geraldine, opening up an old story about how much Norman talked about his previous cage mate, just to mocked the younger bear some more. Tears streamed down her face, she was now in uncontrolable fits of laughter.

In a huff and hurt, Norman could only mumbled “We were.”

“Bert did this, Bert was better at that, Bert was a better friend than you, Bert must have had a small fucking dick.” she said and reeled her pray in. She was making the most of a rare moment for glory.

Norman gave in, he was out of the closet and there was absolutely nothing he could do or say. Raising himself to all fours, he shook his head at Geraldine with contempt.

Geraldine was by now uncontrollable with laughter. All he could manage to say was “Geraldine, sometimes you can be a very spiteful woman.”

Geraldine just laughed louder.

“That’s the last shag you get from me you fat bitch.” Norman said, it was a meaningless defence and without any further attempt to redeem any dignity he simply walked away with his nose in the air.

I'll bet you cant annalise that.

Currently 2.90/10
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Rating: 2.9 out of 40 votes cast